My Ecological Footprint

Note 8: Love Lost by The Temper Trap

The Temper Trap is an Australian indie rock band that formed in 2005. The lead singer, Dougy Mandagi was born in Indonesia, and some of his rich influences from singing in church choirs and listening to his dad play guitar are integrated into the band's sound. As a collective, the band's vocals, guitar, bass, drums, and other instrumental creations produce this unique transcending sound found nowhere else but in The Temper Trap. Love Lost is one of those transcending pieces.

Beginning with a classy keyboard progression, the song is accompanied by the uniform sound of clapping hands. The singer sings “our love was lost, but now we've found it”. Dougy’s voice that so much resembles the Gibb brother's vocals (BeeGees), add to the song's spiritual and emotionally uplifting quality. With just that first line, those four words illustrate an obvious circumstance in which someone (presumably him) and someone else had once lost their love. He sings with so much passion and raw emotion with the proceeding lines of “our love was lost and hope was gone.” Although those lines are very simple, the way Dougy sings those words illustrates this running image of the situation. Further ahead into the song, the words “and if you flash your heart, I won't deny it” suggests the willingness of the lover to take up this salvaged love once again. He then declares that he “won't deny it”, this sacred love, and this other person's heart. And after that, he says “I promise, I promise.” If the words were sung by any other artist, the ingenuity and power of the lines would be lost.

Encroaching upon the situation, it seems that the love and the pleading person are trying to cross into the once-known barriers of this relationship. He sings “your walls are up too cold to touch it, your walls are up too high to climb”, meaning that this other person is not comfortable opening up his/her heart to this person yet. Either too much damage has been done in the past, or the idea of re-opening this love is frightening and risky. But Dougy then pleads with the comforting lines of “I know it's hard but I can still hear it beating.” He tells this person that he understands the difficulty of all of this, but he also knows that this person's heart is still “beating” with all the love in the world, and that he/she has that recognizable thump (heart beats) rhythm that he knows all too well. He then promises again to not “mistreat it”, or take advantage of this person's heart.

In the end, he acknowledges that their love “was lost in the rubble” of all the things this person has “been dreaming of”, meaning that their first run was disappointing and perhaps even disastrous. Nevertheless, he begs this person to “keep [him] in mind” when he/she is ready, because he is “here to take [him/her] every time.” Those ending lines followed by the usual refrain illustrate the devotion and gratitude of this lover.  

Note 7: Fake Empire by The National

The national is an indie rock band that was formed in Ohio in 1999. Their lyrics are usually described as having a dark, melancholic, and ambiguous quality, and their songs' meanings are usually debated often by zealous fans. The many supported claims about the meaning of the songs add to the adoration of the band for their empowering and mind-provoking music. One of these hotly debated songs is Fake empire, one of their most popular pieces.

Right away, a piano plays the melody of the song that invites listeners to the following powerful lyrics. The first lines of the song stir up images of the first stage of romantic relationships otherwise known as the “honeymoon period”. The two people in the relationship have not reached the period of struggle and improvement, or the period of struggle and deterioration. All they have experienced with one another is the staying “out super late” at nights, the “picking [of] apples”, and “making pies”. The two parties are sang to be “half-awake in a fake empire” (the refrain), meaning that the couple chooses to ignore the upcoming tide that many romantic duos will or have endured. The mixture of the piano and the lead singer's classic baritone voice creates this sadness, yet uplifting purity of the song.

They'll “tiptoe through [their] shiny city/with [their] diamond slippers on.” They will even “do [their] gay ballet on ice [with] bluebirds on [their] shoulders.” These rhythmic and poetic lines suggest that they will not leave this dwelling of happiness that they know and love. Nothing else needs to be troubled with, and all they have endured together is enough for them. Why trouble with the kinks and defects of the relationship when everything else is going well? The last lines of the poems illustrate this image of a night's end to a date or night out. One of the partners will “turn the light out [and] say goodnight.” There will be “no thinking for a little while” and no “[trying] to figure out everything at once.” All of this represents the couple's attempt to take control and hold onto this natural “high” of their young love. 

Before the the last refrain, one dagger line “It's hard to keep track of you falling through the sky” may acknowledge the existing cracks in the relationship. The singer seems to almost beg to not discuss or think about all of this just yet. They continue to try to stay in this state of happiness even though they know that there is this very possible or even very likely end coming to them. Perhaps when they are “half-awake”, they both know that they can't stay in this state forever. The ending of the song concludes with a collection of sounds including the piano, drums, guitar, and the appropriate trumpet to wrap up the song. Building up from this emotional tension, the song closes with a much uplifting tone that may push forth the idea that it is okay to just enjoy the ride while it lasts. Love is a privilege to have with someone, and whether you both fall or rise, be glad that this lifetime experience was given to you. The beauty of the song lies in the celebration of both the happiness and the sadness of the relationship between these two people.  

Reading Log: The Perks of Being a Wallflower

16% into The Perks of Being a WallFlower 
Charlie is the main character and narrator of this book. His unique letters to someone unknown is hilarious and devastating. His diction and writing style fits perfectly for his stages in high school. We get to see him grow, experience, and break down in his writing. He doesn't give much information as to where he lives and to whom he is writing to, but he does share with us his world, and that has been enough and more. His letters are humorous, saddening, and sometimes frightening recounts of high school experiences from observing the arenas of sex and drugs to first dates and mixed tapes. I've found this novel that all of us can relate to in some way. I look forward to Charlie's roller coaster journey.

Book Review: Pride and Prejudice

The plot deals with the five Bennet sisters, whose fanatic mother obsesses over marrying off the girls as quickly and as advantageously as possible. Her only concern is to have her daughters financially secure by marriages to wealthy and "ideal" men. A happy marriage filled with unconditional love is foreign matter to Mrs. Bennet.

Most of the action of the novel centers on the two eldest Bennet girls: dutiful Jane and practical, quick-witted Elizabeth. These sisters are occupied chiefly in damage control against the various disastrous almost-engagements set up by their mother, by chance, or by mere follies. Jane and Elizabeth pine after their various objects of affection: the dashing yet befuddled Charles Bingley for Jane, and the grave, calculating Mr. Darcy for Elizabeth.

It's Elizabeth and Darcy that really drive the plot through a combination of their compatibility and their total inability to get together due to stubbornness, pride, and prejudice. Once the two characters break down their barriers, try to understand one another, and receive all the facts about one another, they (especially Elizabeth) realize and acknowledge the undeniable love and respect they have for one another.

Book Review: The Fault In Our Stars

Throughout the whole book, I laughed, tensed up, and cried without restrain. I fell in love with the characters of the story, especially the philosophical pair, Hazel and Augustus. Their humor and love kept me clinging onto my kindle for more, and I never lost touch with the story. Although the plot revolves around cancer patients, there is much more significance to the novel then just a regular "cancer book."

At the age of 12, Hazel was diagnosed with Stage IV thyroid cancer. Until the age of 14 when she received a medical miracle that shrunk her tumors in her lungs, she was prepared to die, and even later she still feels that sense of nearing to death.

As a 16 year old now, she is attending college early, and has lost the opportunity to partake in high school experiences ever since she was diagnosed. She has a small circle of friends and she still lives under the care of her parents (which can sometimes be tiresome for her). Even though she can live for a long time (shorter than for healthy individuals), she must live with this oxygen tank tethered to her.

Every wednesday, Hazel attends a support group meeting held at this church. During one of the meetings, a new person appears. The stranger is Augustus Waters. He is gorgeous, in remission, and shockingly to her, very interested in Hazel. Being with this whimsical and equally intelligent guy will carry her on an unexpected destination and a long-overdue journey. The time she spends with Augustus will not bring her extreme happiness, but will also push her to re-examine all aspects of life and death. Their close relationship will teach her and the readers the defining significance of human life.

Reading Log

102 pages into 1984
This story evolves around the life of Winston Smith who lives in a totalitarian government. The restrictive,  controlling, and purposeless lifestyles of everyone around him including himself is depressive. Every aspect of life, public and private is controlled and regulated. Every situation is dangerous, and you have to be careful to not speak or think a certain way that speaks revolution or rebellion even if you don't mean to. I have yet to discover the ultimate purpose behind the projects and laws enacted by "The Party." Winston seems to be the only one who notices or acknowledges the oppressiveness and cruelty of the government. But worst than that, he feels like he is the only one with this belief. He knows the lies, the alteration of the past, and the hypnotizing/control of the people done by The Party. Yet, what can he do? He's under their control, and he has to be careful to not get caught (there are telescreens everywhere).

Reading Log: Triangles and Looking For Alaska

35% into Triangles, the ladies in their separate lives are falling further into their detrimental mid-life crisis circumstances. Holly is still attending the writing/critique group assembled in the city, and she still has her mind set on writing erotica (one of her many attempted endeavors). All the while, she has to deal with her hormone-raging teenage daughter who consistently never fails to anger her parents, especially her father. Holly seems to be bored with her family life, and still seeks that adventure that (she thinks) can only be found outside of a typical American family lifestyle. Like everything else in her life, she seeks more from her husband and especially more for herself. Having already cheated on him once now, she takes a different refuge at the writing meetings in which another man has caught her interest. Andrea, the single mom still continues to a seemingly lonely livelihood, and she envies the life her best friend, Holly has. So far, she has been discovering the difficulties of parenthood, especially with Harley, her teenage daughter. Along with that, she has just started a restrictive and hard-core diet with her daughter, and her struggle is evident in her hidden cheats from time to time. Marissa continues to care for her ill daughter by herself, but now her gay son has finally emerged from his time of family abandoment, and he shows a genuine kindness she has not seen since he was a young kid before Sophia was born.

19% into Looking for Alaska, Pudge (Miles) had just been kicked out of class because he was looking out the window distracted form Mr. Hyde's discussion. Alaska stands up for him, and thus follows Pudge outside (Kicked out as well), and later Katumi and the Colonel join the rebellious duo. As we go further into the novel, Pudge's attraction towards Alaska growing. He tenses up and gets nervous whenever she carelessly compliments Miles for being cute or adorable. Colonel and Katumi notice this, but not much is said on their parts.

Note 6: Unmediated experience

Unmediated Experience
BY: BOB HICOK

Bob's poem describes the decaying and saddening relationship between an owner (presumably him) and his dog. The readers are first introduced to his seventeen year old dog who is "mostly deaf", "mostly dead", and has a tendency to do "this thing." The owner explains "this thing" by recalling all the times he would call the dog and the dog would not listen or would obliviously walk away in another direction. The dog would "walk towards the nothing of speech", and would even "[trot] down the the drive, ears up, as if [his] voice [was] coming home." Obviously, this dog has aged and has lost much of his senses, and the imagery of the old and worn dog no longer able to voluntarily obey his owner, creates a mood of lost hope and discouragement.

Twice, the author places references of Christmas and Santa in the poem. He describes the owner experiencing the moment of watching his sick dog like "a child [believing] in Christmas, right before you burn the tree down." The owner must feel excruciating pain as he watches his withering dog fail to respond to his calls, yet every time he calls the dog, he hopes and "thinks, this time she'll turn to me", "this time she'll put voice to face", and "this time, [he'll] be absolved of decay." And this saddening frustration is also described as "being a child who believes in Christmas" but this time "as the tree burns as the drapes catch, Santa [will] light] a smoke with his blowtorch and [ask], want one?" These references of extreme childhood disappointments infers a much more painful reality in which his ailing dog will probably never heal or regain her old self.

Note 5: Now it is fall by EDITH SÖDERGRAN

Now it is fall 

BY: EDITH SÖDERGRAN

The poem's landscape and mother-child scenes are illustrated by the Swedish author's declarative and lyrical style. The first lines of the poem are evident images of the fall season, especially the few short lines describing the child of the poem as observing "all the golden birds [flying] home across the blue deep water." Edith describes the child as being "rapt in its scattering glitter", and the otther imagery of "the [rustling] through the trees (the migrating birds)", and the "vast farewell" and nearing "close" affirms the progression to autumn season. "But [the] reunion, that also is certain" produces the aura of hope the child carries or naturally abides to. 

Within the last stanza of the short poem, the seemingly innocent child "falls asleep easily" on her arm, and on "her eyes" she feels a loving "mother's breath." The warm and tender moment of mother-daughter embrace effuses the mood of unconditional love that can usually be found within such an honorable relationship. And "from [her mother's] mouth to [her] heart", the child hears the words, the last lines of the poem, "sleep, child, and dream now the sun is gone." This final close of the poem draws out the sincere emotional language that exists between this mother and daughter, and also beautifies the scenery of autumn with ernest love. 

Note 4: Esperanza by Judith Otiz Cofer

Esperanza

BY JUDITH ORTIZ COFER

My name mocks me

for I was born at the cost

of my mother’s life,

earning my father’s hatred

with my first breath.

All my life

I have scoured a house soiled

with the thick soot of his resentment.

It has left its mark on the walls,

in his eyes, and on me.

All of it I have tried to wipe away.

In my hands I hold a broom,

in my heart—

ashes, ashes.

The beginning lines of Esperanza, illustrating a girl's birth "at the cost of [her] mother's life" suggests the overwhelming burden the daughter must carry. Her Spanish originated name which means hope "mocks" her for her own existence, and with her "first breath", her livelihood earns nothing more than her "father's hatred." Her grim circumstances depicts a life overwhelmed with constant debt, as though she is in constant pressure to pay for all that she has done, which has only been to live. 


Leading into the second half of the poem, she describes the house she lives in as "soiled with the thick soot of his (her father's) resentment." The oppressive imagery of the emotions of both parties and the setting of the house exclaims that "it has left its mark on the walls, in his eyes, and on [her]." These lines emphasize the isolated and depressive lifestyle she leads, as though during her whole life she has been trying to "wipe [all of the mess] away." The ending scene of the girl holding "a broom in [her] heart", and the very last line of "ashes, ashes" draw the poem to its conclusion, that all of the mess and turmoil is still there, and she can't help but try to cleanse it all away even though it may be useless. 

Reading Log: Looking For Alaska

13% into the book (and also 24% into Triangles), I am enjoying the ongoing activities of the story. Miles is still adjusting to his life here at this boarding school. He shows obvious signs of attraction towards Alaska, and he is developing a friendship with his room mate.

As the story progresses, Miles' character is shown bit by bit. As a welcoming gesture, a couple of boys had thrown him, while tied up into the lake. When his friend Colonel (room mate) finds out about this situation, he is outraged and declares that what they did was extremely dangerous.

I'm looking forward to the progression of Miles and Alaska's friendship. It's quite obvious that there is something between them. Even though she has a long-distant relationship with another boy, I can't help but predict something good for the two teenagers.

Anthology: Notes 2 & 3

1. The Animal Odd Couple

Surfing around on the internet, I found this clip with a title that caught my eye, that showed the relationship between two very different animals. After I had chosen my anthology theme which was relationships, I realized that this theme could extend to animal relationships. In this clip, CBS observes an unusual friendship between an elephant and a dog. In this sanctuary for retired elephants, these animals pair up with one another as best friends. Among these massive elephants are over a dozen stray dogs that also live in the sanctuary. Although both groups usually ignore one another, the dog Bella and the elephant Tara are the best of friends. They have formed a distinct and admiral bond that we should all model ourselves upon.

In the clip, the two inseparable animals are seen roaming around the land together. According to the owner’s reports, the two best friends do everything together like a pair of elephants would. Footage in the woods shows this massive elephant walking down a rummaged path with her fluffy small companion. This sweet moment shown in televised broadcasting brings forth a genuine and unbreakable bond forged by these two animals.

Later in the video, the interviewees discussed a time period when the dog Bella was ill. For three weeks, she suffered from a spinal cord injury, and she lay motionless in the office of the sanctuary building. During this time, Tara stayed in the corner of a high-built fence that bounded the sanctuary office; she waited for her best friend in this little corner of 2700 acres of land. Eventually one of the cofounders started carrying Bella down to the fence daily so that Tara could see her dear friend; every time she was brought down, the two companions were excited and eager to see one another. This ritual continued on until Bella could start walking again. At the end of this clip, the news reporter says one line that puts all of us to shame, “Take a good look, America.” These two glorious animals easily put aside their immense differences and formed an everlasting bond. How is it that they can do it, and we cannot? Why is it so difficult for human beings to at least be peaceful with one another? Perhaps the answer exists very simply by the example set by Bella and Tara. We have the choice to live by this example, but the majority of us are too stubborn to take this much easier path of living.

2. Lost in the Hospital  By: Rafael Campo

A Poem About Friendship

Rafael's powerful, yet simple lines drive out a potent and tender story about friendship. His style is lucid yet the meaning of a few lines behold a delicate ambiguous quality that helps sublimate the theme of the poem. 

He first says "It’s not that I don’t like the hospital." The man seems to not detest the environment, but rather acknowledge and feel indifferent about the "small bouquets of flowers, pert and brave", and "the smell of antiseptic cleansers." Roaming around the hospital this man is lead outside by his friend to take a smoke. The image of patients outside smoking with "IV’s And oxygen in tanks attached to them" is frightful and pitiful. The fact that the ill group of people are further endangering their already "wistful" and ailing health circumstances is grim and saddening.

 As the two friends shared a cigarette and the healthy companion held onto the other's hand which was "Like someone’s keys", the moment of bondage is admirable and more significant than the gloominess of illness and death. And as the sun points down on the two friends, it is as if "they were important, full of life, [and] unbound." In this scene in which they are standing together in the strange "tiny patio for skeletons", the differences between the men are forgotten, and their moment of unity is celebrated in the source of life, the sun. In the final lines of the poem when the man "wandered for a moment where his ribs had made a space for [him]" and he thinks to himself that he is lost beside his friend's "thundering waterfall of [a] heart", this moment reaches the apex of the best of friendships. During that time of embrace or perhaps just profound realization, the man is lost, but it is a good lost; a lost into the journey of their friendship and love in which the beginning is vague and the end may be near, but the memories in between are infinite and the love is forever flourishing. 

Reading Log: Looking For Alaska

During Spring Break I managed to read 11% of Looking For Alaska and a bit of Triangles. I enjoy reading the former, but I'm starting to lost interest in the other.

The main character in Looking For Alaska, Miles Halter is still a mystery. There is still much to discover about him and his new colleagues. What I've learned about him is that he is a scrawny caucasian boy who loves and fascinates over famous last lines. He had lived in Florida with his parents, but now he is in Alabama at Culver Creek, a boarding school. I still have yet to discover his reasons for boarding school. He has explained that his Dad had gone to this high school, and that this decision was his own, but I think Miles is seeking for something more. I think he could be looking for a significant change in his life, and that he wants to start living a life that is more exciting and thrilling rather than staying in his sheltered life back home. Perhaps, he is hoping to live a significant life, be remembered, and speak the most beautiful and famous last words when he passes away.

Exercise 3

Dead to You
Black Boy White School
The Lover's Dictionary

A review needs a luring introduction to grab the audience's attention. Once that is completed, an introduction, one that is not telling (or spoiling) the story, but one that gives only a hint of the storyline is required. Then finally, end the review with a smashing paragraph stating how this book could be for you! Grab the reader, give them a small but intoxicating sample, and hook them with a conclusion.

Reading Log: Triangles

22% into the book (according to Kindle), "Triangles" by Ellen Hopkins is a well-leveled and casual book. Three female friends, with differing and struggling lifestyles face their mid-life crisis, and the readers spectate the ongoing events through Hopkin's poetic style. Her poetic verses embody a emotional and powerful scope into the fluctuating lives of these three women.

After getting a taste of the different lives of these women, I feel that the one who is in the toughest position is Marrisa.  The other two suffer from less extreme cases in comparison to the former; Holly regrets her boring family life in which her only role is to be a stay-at-home mom, and Andrea yearns for that perfect husband. All the while, Marissa has to cope with caring for Shelby who is terminally ill and unable to make any motions whatsoever. Additionally, her workaholic husband stows away time at work to avoid having to deal with his sick daughter and tarnished family.

Although I believe Marissa to be the one who suffers the most, the story is beginning to unravel other severities in the lives of these women, and the connections between the three are surfacing. As the story progresses, it will be interesting to see how each situation is dealt with and  how each ends.

Note 1: Hard Times

"Hard Times" by Michael Ryan 


Michael Ryan's poem, "Hard Times", characterized by a gruff, sarcastic, and terse tone,

illustrates a picture of a child's (perhaps his) rotten and base family life. The picture of the

pathetic parents, the "lousy job [his] father lands", and his "mother's rosary-pinching hands"

expresses a resentment towards the mother and father. The pigs in a blanket served for

dinner by the mother is referenced and observed as more than a delicacy. The "Teeny

uncircumcised Buddha penises (cocktail hot dogs in strips of dough)" are referred to as

"puffed-up weenie geniuses" who tells the author to get the "fu*%" out of this home life as

fast as possible.

The sultry, simple and yet potent language of the author flumes an

atmosphere of frustration and perverseness. Within the last stanza, the dad is depicted as

unappreciative and perhaps verbally abusive, while as the mother is painted out to be

emotionally overwhelmed and in tears. Finally, in the last line, the author writes, "I

don't know who to hate or how to feel." The plain words of those lines are as powerful as the

running emotions in this poem. In the end, the readers are left to contemplate how the

the kid will approach the situation and whether the kid overcomes this state of malcontent.

Exercise 2

3. The amount of time implies "the adrenaline roses up on his cheeks..neck gleaming with sweat."
1. “[Taking] the end, made his wrap, brought the rope around the back of his hand and over the palm a second time, wove it between his third and fourth fingers, pounded the rosined glove fingers down over it and into his palm.”
3. "I WILL KILL YOU" in Barry's excerpt pretty much sums up how the mood of the story is

Best Post: Unfettered

Exercise: "The Mud Below" by: Annie Proulx

In this scene from “The Mud Below”, Proulx illustrates a rodeo landscape with an instilled distinctive and image-laden style that spews a western atmosphere. The scene paints a picture of Diamond, the main character “[keeping] his butt cocked to one side, his feet up on the chute rails so the bull couldn't grind on his leg, brad him up, so that if it thrashed he could get over the rope in a hurry.” “[Taking] the end, made his wrap, brought the rope around the back of his hand and over the palm a second time, wove it between his third and fourth fingers, pounded the rosined glove fingers down over it and into his palm.” These cautious and possibly-dangerous scenes suggests that Diamond's lifestyle bears excitement and adventure, and also great risks. His excitement and enjoyment can be shown when “the time came closer and he slapped his face forcefully, bringing the adrenaline roses up on his cheeks...” Whatever Diamond is doing, no complaint or struggle is expressed, and when his adrenaline “roses up on his cheeks”, perhaps his appreciation for rodeo life rises too. 

Reading Log

Having read one of Ernest Hemingway's books before, I immediately noticed the same diction and style in one of his most famous books, The Sun Also Rises. 20% into the book (according to Kindle fire), I am enjoying this story and its characters.

The story evolves around a group of Americans living in France. My favorite character at the moment, who is the narrator, is Jake Barnes. He is a writer like the other characters (Cohn and Frances).

These characters, especially Jake, express dissatisfaction with their lives. Robert Cohn is in an unaffectionate and unhappy relationship with Frances. Frances desires to marry as soon as possible, while Robert feels there is large void in his life that could not be filled by marrying someone like Frances. Then there is Brett who Jake is in love with.

Unlike the other characters who openly express their sorrows, I think Jake locks his pain within his tight emotional realms.  During World War I, he had a major wound that restricts him even now from making love to Brett Ashley, whom he is in love with. The two are very very much in love with one another, but Brett refuses to be in a relationship due to the fact that he is "impaired" (which I think is a ridiculous reason). Like Cohn, she also feels this void in her life. But unlike the former, she knows that Jake would have been the one to fill that sorrowful hiatus.

As Jake drives the storyline with his narration, he rarely speaks out his emotion to the audience. When he does communicate his emotions, it's usually in the form of extreme sadness, anger, or frustration, and his emotional expression is usually never direct. The audience has to infer from his responses to other characters or from his actions when he is alone or with others. I'm eager to find out how his story will end. I hope he has a happy ending.